Shared Concerns

"I don't know if I'll be a good OT" one of my classmates admitted during a research meeting.

Oh, how it rang true.  All the information we've been asked to synthesize.  The little bits that seem to continually fall through the cracks.  How long it takes to makes decisions, complete paperwork and think the way we will be asked to upon entrance into the field.  It can rattle your confidence and make you question: is this the right place for me, the right path for me to be going down?  Our experienced professor eloquently answered that she would be concerned if we did not feel this way.  She thought over confidence in a young practitioner was even scary.

That doesn't make it any easier to be in this place.  Having a client whom I don't know exactly how to treat has continually humbled me and pushed me towards text books, research articles and professors.  Part of it is being an earnest student who actively seeks the information needed to excel in practice.  The other part, however, is time.  Learning from mistakes.  Some failure.  That's the difficult part.  The part I don't feel accustomed to or quite prepared for.

Fortunately, I have professors encouraging me.  Fieldwork placements where I will have time to acclimate to the duties of an entry-level therapist.  After meeting with my fall placement I also know I have a slew of kind therapists that will be available to me.  It makes me believe it will work out.

The biggest challenge, however, may be keeping sight of why I traveled down this path in the first place through the haze of documentation, frustration and mental exhaustion: to help others and effect another's life.  The thought of losing that is the biggest concern of them all.